Happy Thanksgiving 2011 everyone!
I was talking to a friend on Facebook lastnight and the word "drama" came into the conversation? Can you imagine that? Look at this picture of me as a child...there is not an ounce of drama in me! :o)
I started thinking...(oh,oh) Am I dramatic? Am I a drama queen? Well, I can't be a drama queen because the name Sally means princess, not queen. So at best, I might be a drama queen in the making, but I have to wait until the queen dies first or something like that? LOL So lets talk about drama. A few years back I was on anti-depressants. Have you ever been on them? I think they tried me on three different ones. When I told my doctor they weren't working, she upped my dose. Then I had NO emotions. Life was smooth alright, but if someone died I couldn't even feel bad. When something wonderful happened, I couldn't get excited! I missed my emotions. :o)
Here's the thing,...everyone has emotions. Some keep them to themselves, and some live out loud. Some express them. I think it's way more fun to express how I feel, than to keep quiet. If my friends don't want to hear me, they can shut me out...and some do. I like to notice all the little details in life, and think about them, and then talk about what I saw or learned. I like to experience life, and share it with others. I looked up the word Drama. Yes, I suppose I have drama in my life for sure. Drama: any situation or series of events having vivid, emotional, conflicting, or striking interest or results. I think life is a living drama to tell you the truth.
So I think I'll just keep on being who I am, and maybe someday I'll write a very dramatic book and all of you readers will buy it. :o)
I was thinking about how boring it would be to read anything I had to say if I was still on that medication. I probably wouldn't talk at all. A lot of people would have peace and quiet, but I'm not ready to be quiet yet...I have a life to live out loud.
I hope you all have, or had a very blessed Thanksgiving Day Celebration this year!
I am indeed blessed above all I could have possibly imagined. Thank you for being my friends. I love all of you. And everyone of you are different, I like that too. I learn from all of you. I'm a happy blessed woman this year.

Love to All,
Sally

The Garden of our Souls

I have been taking care of the Garden Center at my local Kroger for two summers in a row now. It's my responsibility to grow them with care, and keep them looking beautiful for the customers, so they will sell.
The weather has been very unpredictable and harsh this year. When you have plants growing all around you, inside of a tent, and outside as well...there is a lot to deal with. These poor plants were started from a seed, or a cutting and their sole purpose is to grow and look beautiful, to bring pleasure to the person that purchases them. When plants are subject to freezing cold temperatures, 40-50mph winds, rain, and extreme heat and sun...they struggle to fulfill their purpose. They freeze, and some of their leaves and branches die, the wind breaks the branches and even the leaves. The rain causes over watering and the leaves turn yellow, and with the rain comes more wind. The extreme heat burns the leaves and the flowers.
I could spend a month nurturing a plant to beauty, and one strong wind can ruin everything. When the plant gets damaged, like today with the strong winds, it breaks my heart to have to cut that whole big branch off. But here are some things I have learned about growing plants. For one thing, I have grown plants my whole life, but I grew house plants. They don't live out in the weather, and they have very little problems when they are living in a nice comfortable house with no adversity. If you find the right spot for them, they will be happy as can be and bring beauty to your home for years. Outdoor plants are a whole different story. I have had to learn, when the branches are dead, cut them off. When the leaves turn yellow or brown from the wind and the storms, cut them off. I have experiences with my plants, that even though it hurts to lose a limb, and when I have to pull all those ugly leaves off leaving the plant looking bare...it is the right thing to do, and the best thing for my plants. If I DON'T cut them off, the plant spends it's energy trying to heal or repair the damaged parts, and it stunts the new growth...or slows it down. When I take off the damaged parts,...new growth is accelerated!
To my surprise, I keep learning over and over again...that as painful as it is to cut and pull, leaving the plant looking very homely and not so pretty...if I just give it a little time and special care, the plant will grow back to it's full beauty, and usually more beautiful than it was in the first place. :o) It just takes time. When I first started my job last summer, my boss would come out to the Garden Center and mark down all the damaged stuff to get it out of the store. She thought it was worthless and nobody would want it. But this year I asked her not to do that. I opened a "Plant Hospital" in my Garden Center where I nurse them back to health and sell them for their full price! I take care of them and bring them back to their intended purpose. To look beautiful and bring pleasure and joy to their owners. Some don't make it back, but most of them do.
Today it crossed my mind how much this reminds me of my life. I have a Master Gardener. I'm so grateful that He doesn't dispose of me when my branches break and my leaves turn brown. He prunes me, as much as it might hurt him to do so, because he knows that I will become much more beautiful, and serve my purpose in this world. And I bet he makes the same sorry face when he has to do the clipping. But the storms of life break us. We need to be nurtured back to health, and it might take a little time...but when he prunes the dead or diseased things from me, the life will be forced to bring new growth and pretty new flowers.
I like Gardening. :o)

I think one of my funnest photo shoots was shooting stills for this Gypsy movie a girl named Brooke made near Dickson, TN. I have always loved movie making. The make-up, the wardrobe, the story, the acting,...all of it. The crew was a blast. All professional and fun! One afternoon while I was shooting a picture of this wagon coming toward me, I was asked to step off to the left a little because I was in the shot. So I did. In fact, I stepped over and sat down in the little field next to the dirt road. I didn't realize until the NEXT DAY that my entire back was covered in ticks! John said there must have been at least 100 as he pulled them off one by one. And now I have this story to tell. :o) I had the greatest time shooting on that set. I'll never forget it. I would love to do more!!!

My Mother

My Mother passed away 13 days ago. I have been living with her for the past 10 months. She sat in her chair directly to my right. It's empty now. I went back to Tennessee for a month in October to see my family, and she called me and said she missed seeing me sit at my computer every night. In fact, she said she kept imagining that I was still there and spoke about how she missed me. Now, I imagine her still sitting there in her chair, and I miss her.
I have been very lost since she passed. She was a beautiful woman,...I didn't appreciate her enough when she was right here in the room with me. I didn't thank her enough for all that she did for me. I didn't love her enough for being such a wonderful Mother. I took her for granted. I'm so sad about that now. I wish she was here so I could tell her how much I loved her, how much she helped me, how much I appreciated all of her love and encouragement. But her chair is empty. And she's gone.
Regret is horrible.

Coming Home

Coming home to Michigan was the best thing I ever could have done at this point in time.
It has been so good to reconnect with my Mother. I moved away from here 35 yrs. ago.
Mid life hits all of us differently. It hit me hard.
But Family always brings you back to your roots. You remember where you started....you can get your head on straight again.
I'm so glad that I had the courage to come away and get a clear perspective again.
I think it might have saved both my life, and my marriage.

Thank God.

This is a picture of two of the most important women in my life. My Aunt Sal, and my second cousin Sis. (Elizabeth, or Liz, but to me...Sis) I remember this day. Sis was in town, and Aunt Sal was so glad to see her. I loved hanging out with the two of them. They enjoyed each others company like best friends. It was so fun to watch them talk and interact with each other....Actually, they were more like close sisters that never had to live with each other for long, or get on each other's nerves. :o) I brought my Pentax MX out on the porch and hung out for a while.

Both of these lovely ladies passed on at the same time..., almost, and I miss them both. Aunt Sal was an Artist, and she understood me in ways other people have never understood me. She was such an Anchor and an encouragement to me. She always praised me and lifted me up. She always saw the good and the best in me....the potential, and pushed me on. WE became very, very good friends.
Aunt Sal used to call me to talk once in a while when I was in Nashville and she was in Saginaw, and she always mentioned Sis. She loved her sooooo much.
If we can connect with good family, we are blessed. Family is special.
Aunt Sal and Sis were cousins....Kin. Look at the love. They were both so special to me. I miss them.

Angels and Realizations

This is a picture of an Angel that crossed my life named Bonnie. I found her on a curb at the end of my street in a gas station parking lot. It was a very, very hot afternoon, nearly 100 degrees if I remember correctly. When I got out of my car to go into the store, she said hello to me, and I returned the kindness.
When I came out of the store, I noticed how hot and tired she looked, so I asked her if she was having a nice day and asked her what she was doing in the parking lot, on the curb. It was clear that she didn't have a vehicle, there was none in sight.
She said she was just sitting there enjoying the day. I told her it was pretty hot to be sitting there, and asked if she had some place to go to cool off. She started telling me a story about how her mother lived in Florida, but they were bringing her up to St. Thomas Hospital for heart surgery in a few days, and she was waiting. I asked her where she lived, and she told me "The third bush on the right". She was homeless. She came from Florida herself, to wait for her mother. She wasn't allowed to have anything to do with her Mother back at home. She had many sad stories.
I asked her if she would like to come home with me and get a warm meal and a nice cold shower. She said that she had been praying all day for an angel, and she was sure I was an answer to her prayer. Before she left the store though, she went in and bought two 24 oz. beers, and she offered to buy me one as well, but I said "no thanks". (she had been cleaning windows all day, and had money.)
We went home, she drank her beers pretty fast, and showered. She said she couldn't eat any food. She had forced something down earlier that day, and she gets sick when she eats food because she's an alcoholic. She was a very sad person, with very sad stories, but I blessed her day. She loved me.

This woman was an angel to me. She was the biggest blessing! I won't tell you about the personal ways that she touched me, because they are personal. But I will tell you that we find blessings in the most unexpected places. And sometimes we don't find blessings and answers in the places we have found them before, or expect to find them. It's so important to live daily.

One thing I will say for sure, it's in the giving of ourselves that we find blessing.
When we give, we receive...but the giving is the bigger blessing.
....and when you have needs, try to find one tiny thing that you can give of yourself. Give it with all of your heart, even if it seems like something so small it is almost worthless....because you have nothing else. And you will be blessed. A smile, when you don't feel like smiling, a dime to someone in need, when you wish you had $100 to give, a phone call when you don't have gas for a visit, a kind word when you know someone is down, an "I love you" when you know someone is feeling down or even worthless. A letter, a hug, a smile, a phone call, a flower, a text, a shower and a warm meal.

My Bonnie Angel and I prayed together before she left that day. I prayed for her, and she prayed for me. I offered her a bed to lay her head on. She went on her way, and I never saw her again. I met her a while back.
I am thinking about Bonnie tonight.